Nervous Energy

Our anxiety does not empty tomorrow of its sorrows, but only empties today of its strengths.”
― Charles H. Spurgeon

I am a good victim of anxiety. I suppose it is that, “I can’t control the outcome” part of me. If it was my way, everything would end with rainbows and unicorns with glitter. Today I see my oncologist. I had my scans last Thursday and Monday. I know deep down that there is nothing there. Yet, there is a little dark spot that whispers…there might be. It’s going to be a sigh of relief to hear him say everything is ok. Then the true road of remission can start. I know that it will ease Dan’s mind. I think this nervous energy is why I’ve stayed busy all week. If you stay busy you don’t have time to stop and let your mind wander.

Yesterday, surprisingly, my mind got an unexpected break. I have decided that every Thursday is my day. I was going to go visit the zoo, but the Garden of the God’s called my name.


I like how I can see the park from my house. Yesterday, it really stood out from the mountains. I was actually anxious going by myself. Not so much being alone, rather asking myself, What if I fall? What if I step in a hole and break my foot? At first I just decided to stay in the main park area. Walking down into the park I felt a sense of calmness. I knew I had to keep my eyes and ears open. Most of the birds have returned from their winter vacation. I know there are three kinds of birds unique to the park and I wanted to take pictures of all three. There’s a bend to the trail that stopped me in my tracks.


There are just times when you see something that is just neat. I don’t know why the opening in the park, with the view of the snowy mountains calmed my anxious mind. From there I didn’t think about anything. I just let my ears hear and my eyes wonder.


I decided to get brave and try one of the loop trails. It was a bit painful as most of it was stairs going up and down. It was really neat! It took you up above the main park. The sun was still waking, so I thought the shadows and highlights were awesome. After the loop, I finally found where all the chatter was coming from.



I even got to watch a couple bunny rabbits frolic in the snow.



Leaving the main park, I wasn’t ready to go home. SO I took a right turn towards a trail head. I think it was called Cabin Canon trail. I started park way down it, and got to a point where it looked like we would be going up…a lot… so I turned back and went down the Siamese Trail. Glad I did. It wasn’t too bad. I did spot a Mountain blue bird. I love these birds! They are so beautiful. I tried to get a picture, but the sun was behind the bird. This trail lead to the rock formation called the “Siamese Twins.” From what I could read it is among the most famous places for pictures. Mainly because of the “hole” at the bottom. You can see Pikes Peak. Except, today, Pikes Peak was sleeping in and hiding under the covers of clouds.




AS I walked back down towards the blazer I decided that I was going to go home and print up a map of the trails. I think my goal will be to get down all of them. Each trail leads to a rock formation. I know the Kissing Camels and Balanced Rock. So it’s time to work on the other 16 formations.